I was unsuccessful in returning to Hogwarts yesterday. Please wake me up when September ends.
don’t say you’re a writer if you just write fanfiction for your entertainment. you’re only a writer if you kill a bear with a typewriter to appease the spirit of hemingway and slather yourself in ink in tribute to shakespeare, the one true over-penis of literature.
I almost got mad but then I was amused
a homeless guy just said to me “do you tell jokes to make people laugh or to make people think you’re funny” and that is the most profound shit ive ever experienced
I asked my old science teacher this and he said “I make jokes to make myself laugh because I know I’m funny.”